January’s Top 30 Quotes for Soaps
Kate: I've been snubbed by Smurfette.
EJ: All right. Let's pack it in. Let's just give up. They'll figure it out Anyway. Sami and Rafe... they're probably the second coming of Woodward and Bernstein. You don't have a right to insult my intelligence. I have orchestrated this entire plan and my next move will be just as flawless.
Victor: And how will you plant it on her? Will you just ask, 'Do you mind if I attach this to your bosom?'
Kenzie: Mia... teabags for swollen eyes.
Jason to Michael: "You keep saying you’re a man, that you want to live on your own, but you're acting like a little b***h!"
Sonny: "What you really are is a love sick groupie whose got a crush on a rock star hit man you can never have."
Franco: "As opposed to, say, a daddy who's jealous his favorite has another suitor?"
Lucky: "You don't love me Elizabeth, otherwise you wouldn't be screwing my brother behind my back."
Over talk of Fish and Kyle's romp, Roxy Balsom expressed to Kyle Lewis, "You're the gay son I never had!"
After Stacy tried to run away from Mitch's syringe-flaring nurse, who was trying to drug her, Mitch blocked the exit and said, "Looks like someone isn't following doctor's orders!"
When Jack asked Blair to stay at Todd's and play some games with them, Blair said she could manage to play a few games with Todd, and Addie added, "She sure's had a lot of practice!"
After Clint realized what Kim's motives with him were, he said, "If I'm going to be the daddy, we need to talk about the sugar."
Phyllis learns that Adam just quit Newman. As he steps into the elevator and the door closes, Phyllis muses, "Going down?"
When Heather finds out about Sharon and Adam, she hisses, "Maybe you deserve each other! The klepto and the liar!"
When Emily takes him to task for worrying every time Sharon makes a decision he disagrees with, Jack promises his "GPS is no longer locked on Sharon."
Jack, after reading Victor's scathing interview about Adam in Restless Style, observes, "Even with a transplant, the man is heartless!"
Can you pick a favorite quote from the ones we've covered? Are there more you'd like to comment on?
January was a big month for funny quips from our favorite characters on our soaps. On each soap, there is always one or two characters who brighten up the episode and there are always a few quotes to make you chuckle, almost daily. Here are just a few – 30, in fact, that the Soaps.com writers hope you’ll get a kick out of as much as we did.
Tad and Liza have a spat, and she takes off to the police station to represent Damon. Krystal counsels Tad to go after her and do what he does best. Tad quips, “In the middle of the police station?” Krystal wryly replies, “Not that. Make her laugh.”
Jake and Amanda are in bed. She wonders how he always knows just what to do to make her feel better. Jake replies, “Being married to a doctor means I’ve always got the right medicine!”
Annie apologizes to Adam after her sexy performance lands him in the hospital with cardiac arrest. Adam laughs and tells her, “I’m fine. It will take more than a lap dance to kill me!”
Mick: (to Barbara) Do you really think another girl could consume me the way you have?
Dr. Oliver: I’ve run into a conspiracy of idiots… with a few jerks thrown in.
Dr. Oliver: That’s a long term commitment and I came here for a one night stand.
Carly: (to Jack) You’re like alcohol to me.
Noah: (sarcastically) Sorry you went blind. I brought you a pie.
Carly: (to Jack) You’re the most married man I know,” she reminds.
Steffy to Ridge about the Logans working at FC. “It’s like a clown car. You open the door and like a hundred of them come out.”
Justin: I’m going to arrange a trip to New York.
Justin: Because I don’t want to be in a ten mile radius when Ridge finds out his daughter has the hots for you.
Taylor to Ridge: “You have your Logan and I’m not your Doc anymore.”
Rafe: I knew that was dumb when it was coming out of my mouth.
Chloe: (of her chocolate mousse cake) How can you leave this? That’s not human.
Hope: You’re hilarious. You sleep with my husband and it’s my fault.