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    Remembering Y&R's Jeanne Cooper

    Started by Candace at 2013/05/09 11:23AM
    Latest post: 2015/03/02 07:04AM, Views: 21977, Replies: 190
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    #131   2013/06/20 09:46AM
    Re: Remembering Y&R's Jeanne Cooper

    Also, here's a little scenario Corbin posted about an hour ago. Hope you will all enjoy reading it.


    There's a knock at the door. KATHERINE CHANCELLOR opens it, comes face to face with a TOUGH GUY who looks older and more worn than his years. They stare at each other for a long moment, sizing one another up before speaking. Finally…
    KATHERINE: Can I help you?
    MAN: Yeah, I’m not sure where I am. Can I come inside?
    KATHERINE: I don’t know, can you?
    The man looks at her quizzically, “what is that supposed to mean?” His eyes suddenly bear down on her, perhaps a little threatening.
    MAN: Look, I don’t want any trouble, just move aside and let me in.
    KATHERINE: Why don’t you just wait out here for a while and we’ll see.
    MAN: What? You run this joint?
    KATHERINE: It’s a bad habit.
    MAN: You got a name?
    KATHERINE: They call me Duchess.
    MAN: Duchess? So, Duchess, is this is your "kingdom?"
    KATHERINE: (laughing) Oh No. Not mine. What about you, you got a name?
    MAN: Yeah, Tony. Tony Soprano.
    KATHERINE: You a good man Tony Soprano?
    He has to think about it, perhaps for the first time. Finally nods his head, ever so slightly.
    TONY: Yeah, I think so.
    Katherine smiles, a beam of light that feels so familiar – a recognition of truth.
    KATHERINE: Yeah, I think so too. You and me, Mr. Soprano, we’re gonna get along just famously.
    TONY: Good. So, you gonna let me in then? "Duchess?"
    KATHERINE: No, not just yet. Why don’t you stand there for a moment and think about it.
    TONY: It? What “it?”
    KATHERINE: All of it. He’ll let you know.
    TONY: Who--
    She shuts the door on him, stands inside leaning against it, excitement clearly growing. Then slowly a smile creeps across her face… a player her equal has arrived! Game on!"

    #132   2013/06/21 11:22AM
    Re: Remembering Y&R's Jeanne Cooper

    Happy Friday, Everyone! It's officially SUMMER! Have a feeling it's going to be a HOT one! Here's Corbin's latest post:

    "“Cut, take five everyone,” a powerful voice bellows from the bright lights above and beyond.

    Katherine Chancellor quickly slips off her mask revealing the actress that breaths life into the character; Jeanne Cooper. A sense of delight and urgency play out in the twinkle of her eye, both at once. Somehow you know that the heart of each woman, character and actress are one in the same…A little “Duchess” in both realms.

    Jeanne looks toward the door that only moments ago pretended to be part of a fortress against an intruder, an otherwise gentle guy playing tough, and knows there is a very real task at hand now. She cautiously steps around it, and there, just on the other side is James Gandolfini, not fully yet escaped from his Tony Soprano character or the uneasiness that comes with the journey he’s on. He looks lost… maybe even a bit sad. Jeanne studies him from a distance for a moment, smiles softly and then whispers over to her fellow actor, “Hey, you okay?” James looks up at her, the tough guy completely vanished, his eyes now filled with very human question, and a good dose of fear. He mumbles his answer, “I don’t know.” Jeanne smiles again, fully understanding his predicament, a familiar one, all too fresh in her own mind. “What can I call you? Jim, Jimmy.” He shrugs without looking up, “doesn’t really matter.”

    Jeanne slowly walks toward him knowing that any sudden movement, any great gestures can only produce more panic at this moment. Then, only feet away she stops, looks at James once again, a new smile on her face suggesting nothing but compassion and empathy for the poor fellow. James looks up at her, worry and confusion clearly etched on his face. He tries to smile back but his lips fail him.

    Waiting for an exact moment that only instinct can produce, Jeanne slowly opens her arms wide, inviting him into an embrace. He resists at first but knows he needs human contact… desperately. “What’s going on?” he’s able to utter, voice quivering a bit.

    “Shhh,” Jeanne replies softly, arms still opened wide, “In due time.” Drawn to her like the secret and invisible forces of a magnet, James slowly drifts toward her, little or no resistance. There, he humbly settles into her open embrace. And only when she knows the time to be true and right, again pure instinct, she brings her arms in, enveloping him until he is fully within the cocoon of her comfort and love. His head slowly falls to her shoulders, his breath deepens; both fear and resolve working in unison. Then a gentle whisper works it’s way into his nearest ear, “It’ll be okay. You’re loved. By so many. And those you’ve left behind will be loved and taken care of… It will be okay.”

    James’ breath finally finds it’s natural rhythm and he somehow knows that it will be okay.


    There she is... still doing what she does best. I love you for that momma. Carry on..."

    #133   2013/06/23 08:45AM
    Re: Remembering Y&R's Jeanne Cooper

    Hi, Everyone! Hope you are all having a lovely Sunday morning! Corbin posted this about an hour ago:

    "Good Sunday to all.
    I'm not a huge fan of being terribly obvious (though reading some of the more negative comments in recent days I imagine some would argue that - and it's welcomed with the rest) - but I found a great prayer my mother wrote in her notebook I'd like to share with you today - Sunday.

    An interesting thing here however - which I'll try to convey in how I write this prayer down and remain truthful to her words as edited by her - in some instances she's replaced words at a later date. Critical ones! For instance, "Jesus Christ" simply became "Christ." And in some places she replaced "My Savior" with "A Savior." She must have done this some time later as it is with ink whereas the original writing - like most I found - were simply written in pencil. I'll give you the final version as best I can determine with parenthesis around the things she seemed to want to edit out. Regarding all that...

    I think my mother constantly questioned her faith, Christ and even God. It's a fair process I'm all too familiar with. And I believe it's healthy. In the end, I know her faith, like mine, was sound, but like me, it was an ongoing exploration, a conversation taking nothing for granted but always, always knowing in the recesses of her mind and her honesty - her truth... that her relationship with God and Christ were sound - no matter what words she chose to convey them. Most importantly, and we've never discussed this much, I firmly believe she lived her life in a manner that Christ would have us do. I know her pain sometimes took her off the path, but again, it's only there, "off the path," "in that darkness" that we appreciate the light when our feet hit the road once again. In short, she was true. Always true, and NEVER took a single moment, thought, for granted - giving each their full due and consideration.

    (This prayer is undated, but most likely early 1973 given where I found it in the notebook - perhaps even early January given the opening line.)


    Almighty God, I ask of thee not a New Year but a new day, now. Grant to me thy will and sustain me to carry it out in my thoughts and labors. Strike my soul to the sensation of feeling joyous and good oh Heavenly Father. Demonstrate thy power of all things to me that I shall ever be aware "all is thy will" and nothing becomes mine. Grant to me the intellect to praise and thank you when I step forth and back to praise myself. Grant me the proper knowledge as to when I should give thanks to (my) A Savior, (Jesus) Christ in thy name for all the good I would do. (Oh Heavenly Father) Lift from me all things that dare to stand between me and your love. I love thee God; direct me and my actions to prove it. I ask it in the name of my (a) (Lord Jesus) Christ, a truth - a savior, and with whom I am a joint heir to thee. - Amen"

    #134   2013/06/23 08:58AM
    Re: Remembering Y&R's Jeanne Cooper

    Hi, again. Posted Corbin's last two messages out of order. Sorry. He posted this on Saturday night:

    "Spent the day digging deep into family history. We opened up a container with pieces of our life going back... well, a lifetime, and then some! Talk about a trip down memory lane! Of course there was plenty of junk, but from the darkness there is always light, and man, was there light! Incredible things that I'd long forgotten about...

    The greatest treasure however was a notebook containing my mother's writings called "My Thoughts and Writings" - Jeanne Cooper Bernsen.

    Let me set the stage for this... her "writings." My mom drank. She spent a good many years fighting her pain with the bottle. She's said it before so nothing new here. But during those days she still accomplished many remarkable things... She was, to my recollection, one of the original joggers. That's right. She would rise with the sun, put on her sweat suit - I think it was actually l an Adidas Track Suit - and then head for a pathway in a park that was very near our house. Every morning. And she would jog! I think it was the first time I heard the term "jog." "I'm going jogging!" Evidently it was all the rage. Anyway, when she got home from her "jog," she would have her tea and then hide away in our den and write. In the notebook I found today. Scribblings, stories, poems, index card thoughts, and the ole familiar rants - very stream of consciousness... sounding vaguely familiar?

    Okay, let's get this out of the way, I NOW KNOW WHERE I GET IT FROM! Even the way she uses grammar - the "dash" like the one here - that was all her!

    Suffice to say, the discovery of her writings was one thing today, to see her doing the very thing I do here, or rather me doing the same thing here that she did 45 years ago - pure delight!

    So she rise early, she would jog, she would have her tea, and she would write. She would the go to work (sometimes) and then she drank! Always. This went on for a good 15 years I guess - some of it's blanked out - very conveniently.

    I poured through much of what I found today and realized that her words were, to a large degree, I think, born of her pain. In the morning she wrote to get beyond it, in the evening she drank to forget it. That isn't to say they aren't exquisite words, but often they travel such distances between thoughts... I can only imagine her state of mind. All in all, they are gems, but for me, a subtle reminder of a war that constantly raged inside her. I don't believe she wrote much after the drinking stopped, which by the way, she did VERY MUCH on her own after some brief help. In the end, she won that battle and as far as I know, once she stopped, she never, drank again! Or wrote. All that remains are a few words scribbled that I found today.

    (By the way, now the idea for a book is really coming - more on that in days ahead - but thinking now it might bounce back and forth between my discovery of her words today and some of the thoughts I've been posting from the day we set forth on this journey... )

    Let's start of with one of her more "gentle ones..." I've copied her grammar exactly as written on the page - photo attached. This is pencil on notepaper.

    PEACE - January 4, 1973

    My name is peace
    I'm a funny word.

    I'm rarely noticed and
    seldom heard.

    I'm suited to begging,
    and praying, I'm more

    I'm dead to many
    and to nations a bore

    I'm hard to attain,
    and more to increase

    I'm often confused with my
    cousin - piece

    I'm a joy to labors
    of those who try

    I'm tear and trials
    to the passers-by

    I'm servant to purpose
    place and things,

    I'm gifts of little
    ere not I be king.

    My name is peace
    I'm quite supreme,

    I do exist, I'm not a dream.


    Enough said... for tonight. Peace!"

    #135   2013/06/26 01:04PM
    Re: Remembering Y&R's Jeanne Cooper

    Hi, Everyone. Hope you are all have a nice afternoon. Corbin posed this about five hours ago:

    "Sorry I've been out of touch for the last few days but I've been under a bit of a fog. I suppose digging through mom's things - littered with traces of our family history - and I do mean littered - "stuff" randomly tossed in boxes with the smallest little "this and that," mixed in like a leftover stew, but going through it all has opened doors of both joy and sorrow. I guess. I've been trying to heed my own words, her words; "experience it all, take it in, breath it and then from the darkness the light will be revealed." Sometimes easier said than done.

    It's been "truth time" for me. I often sit here and write words of encouragement, lessons from my mom, faith and inspiration. Then when I least expect it, bam, time to live what you preach. And it's not easy. I feel as though perhaps I've "freight trained" my emotions and plowed right through this who period of grieving. I can feel something still bubbling away much deeper, now wanting it's due. To be honest, I haven't even had a good cry lately but feel all the ingredients needed so near the surface.

    Many of you have warned me, advised me, through your own experiences of loosing a parent or a loved one, that the process is never really over and long at best. I know understand the shape of it, or rather the ever changing shape of it. I know it will also be a piece of me going forward; not a monkey on the back, but rather a newer branch of the tree that takes that grows outward on it's own accord but still firmly a part of the tree. In that sense, it is a continuation of life itself. Like it or not. It will always be present and feed along with the rest of the tree. And have it's own weight and balance.

    Summer is coming and I do look forward to things brightening, but I know I can't force it. Honestly, I want for it to all "pass," but know that isn't something in my control. I can manufacture the semblance of good days, but the truth of those days will always be a part of the process - and for me at least - God's design of my journey - the mystery further revealed.

    So, that's where I'm at. Slugging my through it, hands firmly on the wheel, foot on the pedal, wipers on, driving through the storm. Clearing ahead. I'm certain."

    #136   2013/06/26 01:17PM
    Re: Remembering Y&R's Jeanne Cooper

    Thanks for this Pink ...

    It sounds like Corbin is realizing this is a long,never ending process ...

    Speaking from my own experience ... At first I wondered when I would be able to put the whole thing behind me.

    Then I realized it would never happen and I didn't want it to be ... I like to think back and smile or shed a tear.

    #137   2013/06/26 06:28PM
    Re: Remembering Y&R's Jeanne Cooper

    Quote habbyfan: Thanks for this Pink ...

    It sounds like Corbin is realizing this is a long,never ending process ...

    Speaking from my own experience ... At first I wondered when I would be able to put the whole thing behind me.

    Then I realized it would never happen and I didn't want it to be ... I like to think back and smile or shed a tear.

    You're welcome, habbyfan. Corbin is experiencing the same things I did after I lost my Daddy. You never stop missing those you have lost and you carry your memories of them with you forever. I am really enjoying Corbin's posts.

    #138   2013/06/27 09:45AM
    Re: Remembering Y&R's Jeanne Cooper

    Hello, Everyone. Can't believe it's Thursday already! Hope you are all doing well. Corbin posted this about an hour ago:

    "Another night of digging through the trenches of history! It became easier last night, perhaps by the volumes of stuff to sort through - mostly photos. At first it was extremely difficult to simply dump any picture my mom was in, but by nights end, after thousands of images, it became much easier, especially if we simply had no idea of who the other people in a photo were.

    Which brings me to the salient point of this post - my mother's door was clearly open to all - family, friends and strangers alike. She literally touched tens of thousands of people, shaking their hands, a kiss on the cheek. (She obviously touched millions more who simply watched her on TV over the years.) But honestly, the volume of people she came into contact with, from all walks of life, is simply staggering. And with the exception of once or twice - again literally - the thing we noted (my brother, sister and I) was that her smile could ignite a world on fire! And it was always there, even when we knew she must have been exhausted. And her beauty! The camera loved her. But it was that smile, wide and filled with hope, always, that simply takes your breath away! Thousands of images of that! Hard to simply "dump."

    But alas, "dump" we did; there is only so much one can hold onto and I think we did a fine job of sorting through it all. Tonight we are on to her more personal things as related to her career, reviews, press clippings, and so on. 10 boxes of it! This will be more difficult I imagine, not only trying to understand the personal value but also the historical value and then, what to do with it. We do have an idea brewing: HEADS UP ALERT for her bigger fans; but we are putting a small trove of her more prized career things aside, photos and all, and considering a sale of some sort that coincides with the Young and Restless fan weekend here in August. We believe that her fans should have some of her "stuff." We can then funnel some of the proceeds to her charities once again. A nice full circle and the way she might want it. More on that in weeks ahead. Let me know if you think that's a good idea - especially those committed "Coopers Troopers!"

    Regarding that, Cooper's Troopers - we have a FB page almost complete and I'll direct you there in the next few days. It'll be a great place for us to dig more into exciting Film and TV stuff I have brewing as we discussed, and not burden this more personal space with that. FYI - it will be called Jeanne Cooper's Troopers as there were dozens of other "Cooper's Troopers..."

    Back to our history lesson...

    I imagine it's going to take weeks to sift through all of it instead of the "days" that I had anticipated. All in all, it's an interesting part of this journey. To be honest, the ride of this journey has been nothing short of astounding. I looked back the other night at the first post regarding a concern for her health and now, almost 3 months later... here we are. I also wanted to note that I DO READ as many of your comments as possible and often take your advice along with your love and support. I also am, not sure of the right word, but "touched" by your stories of parents, sons, daughters, brothers and sisters and friends passing and how you've dealt with it. We are, in the end, all in the same boat, on the same sea, vulnerable to shifting tides and swells (of emotion) We are, as she would say, simply one in the same. And that's the real lesson to date, how we are connected. It's why her door was always open... to all those in the photographs I looked at...

    To shut her door would not only mean keeping people out of her life, but more importantly meant she would be shutting herself out to the world. She knew we were all one in the same, thus her door was open, smile on her face, arms open wide to all.

    Along with her writings were little notecards with "thoughts" in a sentence or two... I especially like this one:

    "If people look to YOU for your ABILITIES or CONFIDENCE, keep yours! - INSPIRE THEM to THEIR OWN! They become better - and YOU have become even more!
    Love, Mom"

    #139   2013/06/29 12:23PM
    Re: Remembering Y&R's Jeanne Cooper

    Happy Saturday, Everyone! Hope you are all doing well today! This was posted by Corbin a couple of hours (or so) ago:

    "Heading to my mom's right now to sort through things. I feel strong today, ready for the task. It's hard to believe that it's almost two months ago that my mom left us. Wednesdays have become easier than I thought they would be, faster. All that said, I still have a few voice mails from her on my phone that I can't bring myself to listen to. It's not the sound of her voice - I've heard that plenty with Young and Restless and so on, but it's the personal greeting "Hey Corb, mom here, just checking in, give me a call." Just not ready for that, I fear it will break my heart.

    I've been turning to her quite a bit; however, in quiet moments when I need direction, or that comforting, healing hand of hers. I always get an answer, quickly. She's never evaded me. Then of course my "doubting mind" kicks in and I ask myself, "Am I being delusional? Am I just making up the answer I want to hear?" Honestly, I do wrestle with that. But maybe that's the way it works... in reality, no, she's not "actually speaking," but my inner being, having been schooled by her for so long, knows the answer she would give. In that, she is in fact "speaking" from the great mystery beyond. Fully... truthfully.

    I try to explain to friends my view of God and often it falls into something like that above. I tell them to stop searching for "a guy" with white hair and beard, in robes, sitting on a throne pushing buttons. Try to think of God as that purest connection within in you to the source, the truth at the center of the great mystery, all the questions... something that you are born with where you "instinctually" know the answers - the honest answers. Follow that instinct, the truth in it and know that to be God. In that same way, when I ask my mother a question now, I follow the truth and the answer is revealed just as purely as if she were in the room with me.

    What's the worse that could happen... it just might be right!"

    Modified 1 times(s), last time at: 2013/06/29 12:25PM
    #140   2013/07/02 03:32PM
    Re: Remembering Y&R's Jeanne Cooper

    Hello, Everyone. Hope you are all having a nice Tuesday and are doing well. Corbin posted this about an hour ago:

    "Sorry I've been out of touch once again. Honestly, a mixture of several things...
    First, I've just been knee deep in going through the history book that was my mom's life; incredible letters from Studio heads like Jack Warner (Warner Brothers!) thanking my mom for a performance to the card that was read when she won for best actress at daytime emmys - TONS of memories and keepsakes, each worth taking a minute to read and enjoy... all that times a thousand! So in a sense, I've been deeply involved with her, her history and somewhat in my head about it all with no time to come up for air and connect with you. Also, that time spent has to some degree put me in a place where I've been grieving more than ever. I told my brother and sister yesterday, "I simply miss her. Tons. I miss her voice."

    I've said it before but its worth mentioning again... I've spent so much of my time dealing with the mechanics of her passing, from memorials to sorting through her things, that I've really not taken the personal time to let the emotion and all the waves behind it, crash on my shores. I now feel like the tide is rising and those waves are hitting the beach. Tears are coming more freely, more often. The fog I was in last week is giving way to clarity, but the clarity is a sadness, a missing, a longing. Even writing here sometimes makes me feel as though I'm avoiding. I truly believe if you want to hear and deal with what is most true in your heart, you simply stop what you're doing, shut up, and listen. All the work I've been doing and even some of this communication is just busy stuff to avoid dealing with the reality. I recognize that. Don't get me wrong however, I LOVE our communication and it so lifts me from the darkness and the depths, so that WILL NOT STOP! But a breather every now and then, like of late, might just be needed. I hope you'll understand.

    All in all, this is truly an awakening. A journey that I could have never imagined. It's all so different from what I "thought" it would be like when my mother died one day. Almost every inch of the journey has been the exact opposite of what I thought it might be like. To that end I'm fascinated with it, like the way a great story whether in book or on film, reveals itself. After all it is an incredible and unpredictable story... our lives. 19 men suddenly dying in a fire, a 70 year old woman winning the biggest lottery in history, a great young actor James Gandolfini, on holiday with his son, gone... we simply don't know the story and can only marvel in the way it unfolds, the sadness and the glory of it all.

    As my mom would say and have me do... just experience it and take note, but don't look for took much reason, simply embrace it, all of it. There is purpose in all things, that is our gift from God, the mystery, the source, that center of everything that connects us all.

    Sorry, a bit of a ramble, but that is today..."

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