Umm... (CBS)

Victoria's secret. (CBS)

Genoa City for the week of April 28 - May 2:

The way storylines are rolling out for May sweeps has many thinking that recasts are likely on the horizon for the characters of Adam and Phyllis, especially given the reveal that Michelle Stafford joined General Hospital. Given all the new faces viewers have already coped with, the dramatically changed landscape of "Y&R," and the less-than-stellar state of the show in general, these are going to need to be two of the best recasts in soap history. More thoughts:

Sharon's secret.
While it's nothing new for Victor to stubbornly stand his ground in the face of his family's disapproval, or for Nick to disown him, or for Nikki to leave him, this storyline, albeit dragged out, gave us an interesting element in that Sharon cannot remember the potentially destructive secret she's keeping from Nick - so everyone's at a loss. Sharon's visit to Victor, to ask him of all people, to help her uncover the truth about the secret was truly unexpected - even Victor seemed surprised - a cool twist! What wasn't nearly as cool was the Cassie lookalike being revealed as Mariah. Not only is it implausible that Victor wouldn't have discovered her real agenda early on, but her pale freckled arm with the tattoo appears to be a totally different arm from the one we were seeing when Mariah was first stalking Abby and Tyler and peeps were speculating that Mariah would be a Lily alter-ego. Anyone else smell a hasty storyline rewrite? Perhaps some explanation will be forthcoming. We also learned that Mariah is tight with Ian Ward - sounds like she was once on 'The Path'. This left me wondering if the tattoo is linked to the cult, and if Ian Ward is ever going to do anything significant beyond popping up here and there to leer smarmily. In any case, it's a sad state of affairs for Tyler, who between Abby, Mariah, and Victor, now seems hopelessly emasculated. Boo.

Secret admirer.
Let's all start taking swigs of cooking sherry every time Avery mentions her web series, her fans, any recipe, or ingredients thereof - it might make it more bearable. As if it weren't awful enough, we're now to believe she's acquired a stalker after one episode. Between this development and Ian being on the loose, Dylan's even deeper into the grunting, staring, and intimidation than usual - Genoa City's very own Biff the Bouncer. My vote for the stalker goes to the cute photographer, Austin. Maybe he's also in cahoots with Ian Ward. You never know. Does he have a tattoo?

Ben's secret.
Many viewers are at their wit's end over the endless scenes between Stitch and Kelly alluding to this terrible thing he allegedly did in the past. Here's hoping they just reveal it already before we have to watch much more of NuOldBilly's sneering threats. Surely, they won't have Billy find out what Ben's hiding simply by doing an online search after all this? Right?

Victoria's secret.
So Victoria got her miracle pregnancy and doesn't know if the magic result is courtesy of Billy or Stitch. My money's on Billy, which is unfortunate because this pairing doesn't have the rooting value any longer. Given Chloe's recent crazy idea of getting preggers by Billy to make another Delia, it crossed my mind to wonder how she would take the news. Could it send her over the edge?

Secret affair.
The Hilary and Neil thing is fairly unpalatable. It reeks of Neil having some sort of mid-life crisis or rebound crisis, and Hilary's passion for him seems like overkill. The words 'awkward' and 'uncomfortable' come to mind. Adding to the irritation factor in this storyline was Devon's juvenile reaction to hearing Hilary having sex - attempting to make her jealous of Esmerelda and then grilling her about whether she has a boyfriend. What the what?

Monologues in the park.
Bleh. Let's hope Jack and Kelly hit the sack soon so we can dispense with the long-winded romantic bonding sessions. Their candid conversation about Phyllis was something different, however. Quite moving.

Biological clock winding down.
Aw, who didn't feel happy for Paul when he tearfully agreed to start trying for a baby with Christine? Left me wondering if Paul will get his 'congratulations it's a boy' notification about Dylan before that can happen. How do you feel about the idea of Christine having Paul's baby? Vote in Soaps.com's Y&R Poll: Christine and Paul's Pregnancy Plans.

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- Candace Young