It's You Isn't It?

Monday, April 28th, 2008

Pilar sees through Gertrude, Julian has trouble keeping his mind off sex, Gwen is determined to send Little E and Gertrude away and Luis plays right into Pretty's hands.

It's You Isn't It? image

Eve reminds Julian not to get an erection or he could die, as Esme stands by his bedside. Julian bemoans his fate, but Eve tells him there is hope that the corrective surgery could fix his penis. She tells him to not think of things that arouse him and instructs Esme to keep her clothes on. Esme says she’s pretty hot stuff even when dressed and Julian agrees, so Eve tells Esme to leave and tells Julian she will restrict his visitors. Eve instructs him to think pure thoughts and gives him harmless magazines to look at. Julian isn’t appeased and Eve says he can “Be limp and live or have one last erection and die.” She says it’s not a difficult decision, but Julian says, “Not for you!” Eve and Esme leave the room and Julian tells his penis to “Stay down and go to sleep.”


Julian looks through a Field and Stream magazine and fantasizes about him fishing. He reels in Rebecca who is dressed like a mermaid and Eve and Esme come in dressed in island outfits. Julian reveals his “Rod” and the women fight over him. Julian returns to reality and says, “This is going to be harder than I thought…Not to be hard.” He turns on the TV, but every channel has sexy women on it doing nasty things. He finds a war movie, but the size of the cannon distresses him and he turns it off. Julian lies in bed lamenting the fact he can’t participate in all the smut he sees on TV, but promises he will once again. Julian has another fantasy, this time of Eve and Esme dressed as Crystal and Alexis from Dynasty engaged in a catfight, and says no matter what he does, he can’t stop thinking about sex. He decides to go to sleep, but thinks of Rebecca, Eve and Esme begging him for sex. “I’m destined to die from thoughts of doing the deed,” he chuckles and says, “What a way to go!”


At the Crane mansion, Gwen shows Pilar, Ethan and Gertrude the proof that Little Ethan turned her blue. Gwen wants to send the boy to boarding school immediately, but Ethan and Pilar defend Little E. Ethan says even if he did do it, sending him to boarding school is overkill. Gwen thinks this prank could lead to more serious things like Little Ethan hurting Jane or Jonathan. Ethan and Pilar are outraged at the suggestion, but Gwen holds her ground. Gertrude pipes up saying Gwen can’t send Little E away because she’s not his mother! Gwen can’t believe the nanny would talk to her boss that way, but Gertrude says sending Little E away is not what his mother would want. Gwen asks how would she know what his mother would want, as Pilar looks puzzled. Gertrude explains that she’s heard so much about Theresa from Ethan and Pilar and knows she would never send one of her children away. Ethan agrees, but Gwen says it’s not a decision for the help to make. She says she and Ethan will talk about it later and leaves to take a shower. Gertrude makes her case once again for keeping Little E in town to Ethan. Ethan appreciates her stance and then leaves to find Little E so he can get to the bottom of what really happened.

Pilar thanks Gertrude for being Little E’s champion and wonders to herself if Gertrude could possibly be her daughter. Ethan returns saying he can’t find Little E and he and Pilar discuss the issue of sending Little E away. Ethan says he’s not sure what to do and Pilar tells him to trust his instincts as a parent. She tells him since he’s the boy’s father, he knows him better than everyone else. Ethan points out that he’s not really his father and Pilar says she can’t take it anymore and now that Theresa is gone they have to talk about him being Little E’s father. Theresa panics and interrupts Pilar, offering her some hot cocoa with chili pepper. Pilar questions this offer and Theresa says she used to work for a family in Mexico and that’s how they liked it. Ethan tells Pilar he needs to find Little E and they will talk later, but assures her it’s his responsibility to do what’s right for Little E, not Gwen’s.


Pilar says something in Spanish to Gertrude and Gertrude answers. Pilar is surprised to learn Gertrude knows Spanish and says, “It’s you, isn’t it?” Theresa tries to play it off, but Pilar is overjoyed to realize her daughter is alive. Theresa admits it’s her and the women cry as they reunite.

Gwen goes upstairs and runs into Rebecca who has straw in her hair from her romp with the fake doctor. Rebecca is stunned by her daughter’s blue appearance and Gwen explains what happened. Rebecca and Gwen discuss sending Little E away and how Gertrude gets under Gwen’s skin. Gwen says her gut tells her that keeping Gertrude around will be trouble, so she plans to get rid of her once she sends Little E away.

Luis and Fancy make out at the hospital, as Pretty and Sheridan look on. Sheridan taunts Pretty that her plan isn’t working so well, but Pretty is undeterred. As Luis tells Fancy she has nothing to worry about where Pretty is concerned, Pretty comes out and asks Luis for a ride home. Sheridan thinks to herself that Pretty is awfully good at driving wedges between people, while Pretty plays the victim and thanks Luis for taking care of her.


Luis brings Pretty home to her room and Sheridan and Fancy enter. Luis tells Pretty he and Fancy have plans, but Pretty has other ideas saying she was going to work on decorating the nursery and wondered if Luis wanted to help her. Fancy can’t believe she wants to do it now, but Pretty wants to be prepared. Fancy sees right through her, but Pretty pretends to be offended that she would think she’s trying to come between her and Luis. Luis says he and Fancy already had plans and Pretty says maybe she should have had the abortion after all, so she doesn’t bring an unloved child into the world. Luis assures her he loves and wants the baby as Pretty and Sheridan exchange worried glances. Luis says he will help her plan the room and Pretty runs off to get supplies. Fancy tells Luis that Pretty is manipulating him, but Luis doesn’t think so. He thinks she’s just a scared single mother and he needs to ease her fears because he can’t risk her changing her mind and having an abortion. Pretty comes back and listens as Luis and Fancy argue and thinks, “Listen to them go at it. And I’m just getting started!” Luis promises Fancy he won’t be long and they can spend the rest of the day together. Pretty enters the room and Luis follows her to the nursery.


Fancy tells Sheridan she thinks Pretty will succeed in breaking her and Luis up. Sheridan smirks and thinks, "One down. One to go.” Sheridan agrees with Fancy that Pretty is using her pregnancy to win Luis over and says she went through the same thing with Beth when she pretended to be pregnant. Fancy suddenly wonders if Pretty might not be pregnant after all.


Next on Passions:

Someone on a bullhorn tells Juanita she’s under arrest.

Pilar tells Theresa, “You have to leave Harmony before it’s too late.”

Tabitha says, “Evil really is coming to Harmony.”

Luis assures Fancy, “Nothing is going to come between us.”

Esme yells out, “Shades of Bruce Willis, Julian is going to Die Hard!”

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