After leading a Celibacy Club meeting with Rachel and Quinn, Emma goes to the staff room and talks to Will about the difficulty of preaching abstinence with high school kids. Just then, much to Will's delight, Holly Holliday (Gwyneth Paltrow) enters the staff room and says she's the substitute sex-ed teacher. Holly informs Will that his glee kids seem to be totally uneducated about sex, and suggests to Will that they teach the kids about the birds and the bees. When Will discovers that Brittany erroneously thought she was pregnant with Artie's baby, he decides to take Holly up on her offer. At glee club, the educators inform the kids that it's time to prepare for Regionals but to also learn a thing or two about safe sex. Holly proceeds to perform "Do You Wanna Touch Me There (Oh Yeah)" by Joan Jett.
At the coffee shop, Sue meets with Kurt and Blaine and informs them that she has some dirt on the New Directions squad. She reveals that the McKinley kids are trying to be sexier in their performances, which inspires Blaine to suggest that the Warblers do something equally sexy at Regionals. Back at Dalton Academy, the Warblers practice "Animal" by Neon Trees. Meanwhile, at McKinley, Emma approaches Will and laments her disgust about Holly being so sexy with the kids.
While hanging out, Santana and Brittany discuss the intimate relationship they have with one another. Brittany reveals that she's confused about her emotions, so she and Santana ask Holly for some advice. Holly reminds the girls that attraction doesn't tell as much as falling in love. Meanwhile, Kurt talks to Blaine about his discomfort about acting sexy. Blaine tries to coach Kurt into acting sexy, but to no avail. Back at McKinley, Will and Holly discuss an idea for an upcoming performance. They tango while singing "Kiss" by Prince. When the song ends, the teachers lock lips and Will admits that he wants to be with Holly. She kindly rejects Will, claiming that she's damaged goods and would be no good for a nice guy like him.
Blaine visits Kurt's dad, Burt, and asks if he's ever had a sex talk with his son. Blaine admits that he envies the close relationship shared by Kurt and Burt, and that Burt should take advantage of it by talking to Kurt about the birds and the bees. Back at McKinley, Holly, Santana and Brittany sing "Landslide" by The Dixie Chicks. Later, Emma leads another Celibacy Club meeting with Quinn, Rachel and the newest member, Puck. The group decides they'd like to perform a little ditty of their own with the help of Emma's husband, Carl (John Stamos). They sing "Afternoon Delight" by Starland Vocal Band, not realizing that they're actually singing a sexually suggestive piece.
At the Hummel residence, Burt gives some sex pamphlets to Kurt and says it's time to have "the talk." Burt ultimately says that Kurt needs to be sure to not throw himself around as if he doesn't matter. An uncomfortable Kurt thanks his father and asks to be excused. Back at McKinley, Carl asks Holly if she can counsel him and Emma about a relationship issue they've been having. Carl reveals that even after four months of marriage, the two have yet to have sex. After some discussion, Emma reveals that she's confused and has some unresolved feelings for Will! A dejected Carl suggests that he and Emma take a break from one another.
In the hallway, Santana approaches Brittany and admits that she has true feelings for her. Santana also admits that the only thing keeping her from pursuing Brittany is being scared to experience what Kurt had to go through when he was at McKinley. Santana then gets upset when Brittany says that if she didn't love Artie so much, she'd consider being with Santana. Meanwhile, Lauren shares her disgust with Puck over him joining the Celibacy Club. She then kisses him and reveals she's also going to join the club! At the next meeting, the gang discovers that Quinn has a hickey, but Quinn pretends it's just a burn. In reality, it is in fact a hickey, courtesy of Finn. In the auditorium, Holly approaches Will and tells him that she's leaving to teach at another school. The two agree that they don't want to say goodbye, and share in another kiss.
I'm torn about how to feel about this week's offering of "Glee." On the one hand, they did a Prince song, which completely rocked my world. Also, Rachel didn't have a solo, which always makes me happy. But let's be serious, please. The episode, overall, seemed quite messy and even a little bit random. That may be the result of having to accommodate guest star Gwyneth Paltrow back into the story line, but who am I to judge? I actually dug her performance yet again, and think it'd be great to bring her back. Call me crazy, but things aren't over between her and Schuester. Speaking of Schuester, at what point does this guy get fired? Last episode he's offering rides home to his drunk teenage students. This week? Letting the kids grind it up with a hot substitute teacher. What gives?
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