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    Revolving Doors.

    Wednesday, February 17 2010
    Dante, Liz, Luke and Sonny entertain a myriad of visitors.

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    Posted by hera at Thursday, February 18 2010 09:36 AM

    da_kid - IA with your comment re. Sonny's childhood. The problem that I had with his talking with Dante is that he is not being sensitive to Dante's situation. It really doesn't matter that Sonny didn't know that Dante was his kid. Dante needs time to process all this new info and that he almost died. He was staring down the barrel of a gun and was ready to die. Sonny needed to back off and it was far too early for him to go to Dante and tell him his life story. It wouldn't have hurt for Sonny to take a breather and step back and give Dante some space and time. At the same time, I can understand that Sonny was desperate and remorseful. His childhood should not explain away his actions. It explains how he made the life choices and humanizes him, but having a horrible childhood doesn't make his crimes any less abhorrent or morally reprehrensible.

    Posted by FUBU at Thursday, February 18 2010 09:46 AM

    Sorry, thanks 4My.

    Thanks to all of you I love nothing more than a great debate and on this topic I can clearly see the other side. Like you said Lilmafia, it is all about perspective.

    Hera I am in counseling now for the issues I have with my mother and hopefully one day I will be okay I am keeping my fingers cross and determined to keep working at it.

    Da_Kid you are so right on how issues from our childhood have ways of affecting us in our personal lives. My co-workers see a totally different person than my husband does. They would be shocked at the person I am when I am with him.

    I have issues with control and feeling like I have no power in my life. In this I can relate to Sonny. That is not something you can easily fix and it was not until I saw just how abrasive and combative I was being towards my husband whom I love very much that I realized how far the abuse I received from my mother went.

    In my mind I am determined not to allow anyone to mistreat me, take advantage of me or make me do anything I don’t want to do. But the person on the receiving end sees a nut job for lack of a better term or a very difficult person.

    I have great big wonderful walls that I have erected around me and they have been there for most of my life. Breaking them down is not going to be easy.

    For those of you who have absolutely no idea of what I am talking about. The next time you see your parents if they are still living hug them and tell them you love them more than life itself because you truly have something to cherish.

    To the GH Show Writers and casting personnel

    It would be very nice to see some people of color on this show and I am not talking about either one woman or one may but a few. If you need inspiration, look to All My children and One Life to Live.

    Posted by FUBU at Thursday, February 18 2010 09:50 AM

    Hera I agree that Sonny needs to back off. But to Sonny he is a man working on borrowed time. He is trying to get to know his son before he is carted off to jail. But jail or no jail he needs to give Dante time to absorb all of the life altering changes that have been thrown at him lately.

    Lilmafia, thanks for explaining the gun thing rationally I can see exactly where you are coming from. However when it comes to my kids I am not always thinking rationally. If they are with me and there is danger around in any capacity they are first and foremost my #1 priority.

    I would not have been thinking I am bringing the aim of the snipers gun closer to my child. I would have been thinking I need to cover my child’s body with mine so that they don’t get hurt.

    Posted by hera at Thursday, February 18 2010 09:56 AM

    lil - glad that Gia enjoyed Wicked. I love the theater and wish that I could see it more often.

    aussie - Shaun White is pretty amazing. I was watching the snowboarding and was just blown away by his run. It was just unbelievable. I was sitting there with my mouth hanging open. I was causing such a racket with my whooping and hollering that my mother and brother came running to see why I was carrying on.

    STORM - stating the obvious, we have different perspectives on Liz and her behavior. However, I think that we can agree that that Liz should not have accepted Lucky's proposal. When Lucky gave her an out, she should have taken it. There was a moment when she could have ended the engagement and relationship with Lucky without having to tell him about Nik if she really didn't want to tell him. Each time Liz acted cowardly. It was terrible. Does Liz love Lucky? I believe that it is possible to love someone and still do terrible things and mistreat them. I am not attempting to mitigate the horrible things that Liz did to Lucky, but I believe that many of us struggle with a lot of disconnects in our lives. We love this person but we treat this person badly. We shouldn't put up with such terrible behavior, but we love this person so much we can't walk away. I believe that it is possible to change the terrible behavior through therapy, commitment to do and be better and hard work and if the love for the other person is real and committed, a relationship can be salvaged.

    Re. Steve, I see him as trying to be a support to Liz while encouraging her to do the right thing which I thought was that Liz should end it with Lucky, that he deserves to know the truth about Nik. I felt that Steve conveyed his disapproval of Liz waking up the boys in the middle of the night and taking them to Grams. Perhaps it wasn't the stern reprimand that some were hoping for, but he did express his concern.

    I am bit confused when you referred to Liz throwing Lucky's drinking in his face. Were you thinking of Nik? IA - I so wanted Lucky to punch Nik but as always Lucky is the classier man and he rightly refrained from hitting that pompous waste of space. Nik is in serious contention as the worst parent on GH. Talk about emotional neglect of Spencer.

    Posted by FUBU at Thursday, February 18 2010 10:02 AM

    Spenser who? Does the kid even exist anymore?

    I believe he is not even cast, we see so little of him they could just go outside the studio and pick some random kid up off the street send him to hair and makeup, ask him to repeat a few lines then put him back outside with a lollipop.

    Posted by hera at Thursday, February 18 2010 10:12 AM

    FUBU - I wish you the best of luck with your therapy. As someone who has had years of therapy, both secular and spiritual, I believe that it will bear good fruits for you. I never thought that the breech between my mother and me would be mended. I had many years of anger, bitterness, despair and resentment toward my mother (and my father). Growing up I never once heard my mother tell me that she loves me. My mother struggled with depression and was very unhappy. so it was bound to affect me too. Being able to accept my mother as a human being who happened to be my mother and that she was doing the best that she could under her circumstances was liberating for me. And I could still own my opinions that she made mistakes as well and not feel terrible about it. I am responsible for my own thoughts, actions and behaviors, no one else's. Understanding why you have those walls will be important. The walls may have been necessary at some point in your life, but they may no longer be.

    I assure you that you will be okay. Already you are okay because you are doing this for yourself - that's a sign of self-love.

    I hope that I am making some sense. I just looked at the clock and realize that I have to finish this post quickly. I just want to say again that your being in therapy is great and I applaud you for it. Stay courageous and fearless no matter what.

    Also, ITA that we need more characters of color. I was thrilled to see Dr. Kelly the other day, but we need to see her and Lainey more regularly. They need to be contract and front and center. OLTL and AMC are great that way.

    Posted by ttoyou at Thursday, February 18 2010 10:17 AM

    To be fair here, FUBU, you will notice that children only appear when it fits the story line. I've seen no time that would have been good for Nik to be with Spencer. But, we never see Nik horse back riding either but we're supposed to believe he does. Perhaps Spencer rides with him. Don't forget he's a prince and don't they have more worldly things to do than to always focus on their kids? And doesn't he have lots of servants, nannies etc. to take care of the child's every need?

    Posted by lilmafia at Thursday, February 18 2010 10:42 AM

    FUBU: I can definately see where you are coming from on the Michael's shooting item. I think like most things it's all about perspective. Ironically if the dad in the scenario had not been familiar with guns and marksmen (say it was Patrick with Emma) I would have expected him to cover the child. I think what I'm trying to say is I feel that knowledge should influence the instincts.

    FUBU and Hera thank you for sharing your personal childhood experiences. Both were touching and I am glad that you are both handling them in responsible and healthy ways. I think this is what I was trying to get across about good vs. bad parents. Bad people can be good parent and vice versa. My parents were not perfect. To most my mother would have appeared perfect but she was not too interested in mothering, I was more like a doll or show piece to her, but she loved me and recognized her flaws and hired on a nanny who took care of the day to day and was warm and loving. (She's now like an extra grandma to my kids.) And my father whom from the outside may be judged as unfit, was doting and loving. He put me first in at all times and above all else. (Including my mother, which might be where the problems came from) But despite the flaws, I am thankful for both of them everyday. But your posts remind me (and I'm betting several other posters) how lucky I was. They may not have been perfect, but they did all they could to give me the best of themselves. Not everyone is so lucky.

    Posted by Roobeedoo at Thursday, February 18 2010 10:58 AM

    I would like to give Ringleader a huge "shout out" for this post "Posted by Ringleader at Thursday, February 18 2010 08:15 AM". In my opinion you were right on point.

    Posted by FUBU at Thursday, February 18 2010 11:06 AM

    Liimafia, you are a perfect example of Michael and Sonny’s relationship. If someone were to come up to you and tell you your father is a horrible man and deserves to go to jail or whatever they would probably think your had unleashed the wrath of God on them with your response. As is should be, he is your father morally right or wrong and your love for him trumps just about everything else.

    When little Spenser grows up I wonder what kind of a father will he say Nik was?

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