GH Rundown Weekly Blog image

Hello Ava. (ABC)

Never mind the PCPD. (ABC)

The GH Rant from July 7 – 11:

A few minor surprises didn't make up for the expected storyline fails any of us could imagine with our eyes closed. This viewer was left pining for something more than who would supply a heart for the housekeeper.

Oh, for Heaven's sake.
Deathbed confessions are usually a fail and so it was with Rafe's attempt to tell Patrick what really happened the night he ran him off the road. Viewers are forced into awaiting the return of Faux Luke and hoping that someone else nails Nina for her wickedness. Tracy was the one who turned up the ick factor another notch when she looked interested in the news that Rafe was brain dead. Then, we just had to cross our fingers that Alice could spit out what she overheard Tracy saying to Faux Luke.

Penny for your thoughts.
Delia played the part well of acting the annoying houseguest while trying to pull one over on Sonny with Ava. It was no surprise that her talents extended to being able to crack a safe and banter hardily with Olivia while trying to keep her cover. Alas, poor Delia was whisked away by Shawn because Olivia was smarter than that. Hopefully it won't be the last time Delia entertains us because Ilene Kristen rocks with all the quirkiness she brings to her character.

Thank you fireworks.
Sonny and Olivia may have been stuck on the last Fourth of July but Nina was appreciating the effects of the recent fireworks with her husband until Rafe botched everything up, followed by Sam and Cuckoo, well she meant Kiki. Nina probably felt vindicated when Rafe didn't make it through surgery so she could continue seeking her revenge.

It was another week of the writers remembering our characters have love lives (or hope to have them). Franco and Carly, Shawn and Jordan, Alexis and Julian, and Nate and Maxie were thrown together to work on issues or be supportive of one another. Special mention goes to the Lucas, Brad, and Felix triangle…and maybe the Michael, Morgan, and Kiki triangle that we got a little teaser of. Is Kiki going to go fickle on us? I hope so even though nothing was as exciting as what brewed between Maxie and Nate unless you count Nina's watchful eye on Silas. Still, love is lukewarm in the city. This is not turning out to be the hot summer of love we had hoped for yet. At least Franco explaining to Carly how he obtained his new job in art therapy and Maxie and Nate trying to explain their evening handcuffed together to Lulu and Dante respectively was amusing.

Busiest run.
Wow, Jordan couldn't run through Port Charles without running into a hot guy, the police chief, and a mobster. She and Anna really need to stop meeting that way. Now if this storyline could just pick up some speed despite the absence of Faux Luke. Mickey Diamond might save the story for anyone who still cares. I'm still interested in who he is and what he is doing in town. If they want to redeem Julian, now is a great time to recruit him on Jordan's team so they can work together.

Facing demons.
Everyone was pulling for Patrick. Nina, Epiphany and Patrick's conscience weighed in on the matter of Rafe's life. Justice for Gabriel won't happen at the end of a scalpel and the only character whom this revenge theme made sense with was Nina but we were tortured with character inconsistencies. Maybe Patrick would have a devil on his shoulder but it wasn't likely that Epiphany would be so unprofessional in reminding him of what Rafe did during the surgery. Even the hint that Sam thought Patrick failed was annoying after she professed to Silas that it was unthinkable.

Last week's blog will have to serve as a testament to the bad breaks and life choices that led to Rafe's demise, especially after Nina came into his life. Silas was busy taking the blame at Rafe's bedside, as he should since his apartment had become a retreat for the young and misguided without offering one iota of adult supervision. Hardly anyone did anything right for Rafe.

Friday Follow-up.
Friday's show woke up a bit even if too many deaths and fake deaths lately seemed to dilute the integrity of the show. Keeping Rafe alive could further along more storylines than killing him. Nina reached new levels of cruelness and creepiness making Silas confirm Rafe's dire situation but Tracy took the lead in insinuating she found Alice a heart to further her agenda as well. Aside from that craziness, even if Tracy was mildly entertaining, Sam's confrontation with Patrick was poignant and Lulu's nod to Lucas to be with Brad if he wanted was endearing. Silliness prevailed when Brad wanted to prove to Felix how passionate he was but it ruined Lucas and the viewers' mood when Lucas caught them. Dang, Lucas came to make a decision who he wanted to be with and left us hanging. Yep, possibly too many deaths, too many manipulations and too many loose ends. Let's wrap something up. Here's an idea, let Nina be the next to go because her awful confession at Rafe's bedside was sickening. That's actually a positive shout to actress Michelle Stafford. And then Rafe woke up. Oh! I can't wait until Monday now.

Who called?
Funny how I didn't see Nate make a call to immigration. Maybe Dante stepped out and was the bigger Dudley Do Right between the two of them to do so. Or, perhaps it was Levi who has a history of making questionable phone calls. Don't we wish Levi had a one-way ticket to ride out of Port Charles? Our luck will be that this could lead to marriage. What do you think happened? Take's General Hospital Poll: Who Called?

Let's digress.

Queen of Digress – Delia. She can go off-topic in a heartbeat. She's also the Queen of Nicknames this week after calling Olivia Falconeri "Ms. Falconberry," and Queen of the Coolest Shout-out when she caught a glimpse of Sonny's dad in a photo. She thought Michael Corinthos I, a.k.a. Mike Corbin, looked like her husband Roger Coleridge (her husband on "Ryan's Hope"). Both men were played by actor Ron Hale).

Off-kilter logistics – Rafe crashed near a roadblock. No one was immediately on the scene to attend to him and Molly, and Dante and Sam showed up prior to anyone stationed at the roadblock.

Biggest character surprise – Dr. Obrecht gave Franco a real job. I don't know why I thought she was going to ask him to do something crazy and illegal. Maybe she's as redeemable as Britt on a good day.

Hearts don't grow on trees – It's exciting that Alice is back on the scene. Actress Bergen Williams who plays the Q housekeeper/woman wrestler The Dominator, actually is a cancer survivor, chef, and health activist. It would be great to see her role on "GH" expand to something like Richard Simmons' character was back in the day when he promoted weight loss. Maybe she could run Michael's restaurant with Levi and serve healthy fare.

Bad Employee of the Month – Nurse Epiphany for her unprofessional behavior during Rafe's surgery.

Greatest commentary – Nate pointing out Levi's case of situational ethics while Levi indulged in a long shower.

Longest pause – Patrick hesitating before announcing Rafe was brain dead to Silas and Sam.

Touching moment – Morgan memorializing Alice while waiting for her to wake up.

Over-the-line name calling – Brad calling Felix the "Hungry Hungry Hippo Homosexual" but his attack on Felix watching "The Golden Girls" with Lucas was impressive. "It's foreplay, the next thing you know you'll be watching 'Knots Landing' in bed."

Best lines of the week.

Delia to Ava, "If I get caught I'm going to be sleeping with the whales."

Sonny to Ava, "I can't wait to see what's in store next, because if it's anything like this Delia mess, it will be highly entertaining." Ava, "What can I say Sonny…when you're right, you're right."

Delia to Olivia, "Don't start something that your bony behind can't finish." Olivia, "Believe me lady; I've had steaks bigger than you." Delia, "I am Grade A Washington Heights prime beef. What kind of heifer are you?" Olivia, "Bensonhurst! Born and bred."

Felix to Lucas, "My last name may be Dubois but I'm far from Blanche."

Maxie on the phone with Diane Miller's office, "He's not al-Qaida, he's Australian and he's a vegan for God sakes."

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All screen shots courtesy of ABC.

- Violette DeSantis